Time for some good old fashioned list making, to see how life is right now... so brace yourselves!
Good things this week:
* I finished my Traditions of China midterm! At nearly 8 pages it's the longest thing I've written yet this year. I am not looking forward to my final for this class, but it's still a couple of weeks off, so I suppose that's good then.
* I finally have things figured out somewhat in dance. I almost can't believe it's the same me sometimes... I'm less clumsy. Of course that means nothing when I trip up the stairs every other day.
* Today was laundry day, so I have clean sheets and clean socks! It's a pain to get up early to do it, but the feeling of accomplishent is wonderful.
* It's still warm. It rained earlier in the week, but it's sunny now so I'm happy!
* I signed up for a room for next year. I get to live in the pretty dorm! It has beautiful Greek columns out front and interior hallways and I got a corner room with three windows on two different exposures. All the best exposures were all either taken or in suites with boys... but I still got a corner room, hooray!
* My fishy is happy and healthy and getting HUGE. You should see his giant red tail fins. Everyone else's fish seems to be getting sick/dying/having weird tail fin maladies... but my beautiful Bernard Geoffery is now large enough to be longer than his name.
Less than good things:
* I still have a German test tomorrow. Not something too bad to worry about, but it means actually finishing all the homework I've been neglecting.
* I'm WAAY behind on reading for Core. I'm sure I can either catch up or fake it, but I feel bad because it is important stuff and I've been neglecting it.
* I have to think of a project for my Traditions of China final. What do I want to do research on and write a paper about and think of a project for? What is interesting about China? And more importantly, what can I find information on?
* No trip to Seattle this weekend. It's no one's fault and I'm not really upset about it, but I'm disappointed.
* Can't go home this weekend either. I suppose I could, but the real reason for going THIS weekend since I'm also going home next weekend is that my sister is getting baptized and I'd miss it even if I DID go home so there's no point.
* I still have something like 6 weeks of school left. You people who are counting in days have no idea what this is like! (Ok you do, but it's still different.)
Seems that the lists balance out neatly... that's nice. Maybe there's hope after all. I'm considering becoming a Taoist and doing things by not doing them and sitting in harmony with the universe. Of course I think too much to be a good Taoist so maybe I'll just settle for having my lists come out even and call it good.
The hair is GONE! Gone gone gone gone GONE! It has been 2 years but I finally got a haircut today. I donated 10 inches to Locks of Love and it was worth every miserable day of stupid long hair to be able to do that. The beauty school in town offers free cuts to people who donate, so I took my life into my hands and got it cut there. It's really cute, short and swishy and lots of fun. I'll get a picture soon, no digital camera here tonight though.
In sadder news... Sarah's bunny died. I'm not good with pet deaths (having only had one fish in my life and he died a few times - long story) but she is really sad, and upon thinking about it... so am I. I'm still not sure about the whole death thing, having had to deal with it in only a remote kind of way my whole life... but I'm really sad. Go figure.
No more deep thoughts tonight, it's too much work on a Monday. Get some sleep everyone!
Today was a Bible Jim day... I'm sure I've complained about him before. For those of you who may not remember, Bible Jim is my nickname for the guys who stand in Red Square with GIANT signs saying things like "Repent or go to Hell" or "God hates Sinners". When they were last here I rather embarassed myself by getting all upset and... yeah. This time, I decided to ignore him. It's not what I would like to do, as it is not proactive and it lets his voice be heard over mine... but for the sake of my mental health it's what I've decided to do.
I've discovered that I'm part of an ever shrinking minority in this country... Christians who people don't seem to hate. Maybe you hate me, which is too bad, but it seems like lines are being drawn in the sand and they're not very sensible. Christians seem to get dumped into a hole with Bible Jim and Johnathan Edwards (think literary reference there) and John Ashcroft... people who are out there to impose our beliefs on everyone else whether they like it or not. Now, I won't lie... I really wish everyone could find the same peace and joy in my faith as I do, but I also know that it is a very personal decision for people, so I don't like to force the issue. I like to talk about my faith, but in a one-on-one kind of setting rather than a huge open forum. Sometimes it makes me feel like a wuss when my pastor at church has a sermon about mission work... but I also know that I am far less likely to hurt anyone this way than I am any other way.
And I think that is what bothers me most about Bible Jim. He is hurting people, and that was never what Jesus wanted us to do. I know that there is right and wrong in the world, but I don't know that there are good and bad people... everyone has a little of each in them, and doing wrong things does not negate the right things he might do as well.
But enough on that... my actual reason for writing this was to comment on one of the signs. One side says "repent or go to HELL" and the other side has a list of sins: "Covetousness, Idolatry, Materialism, Drunkeness, a couple I can't remember, and Free Sex" Now, what I want to know is, does Bible Jim believe it is better to pay for sex than it is to do it for free? Something to think about.
In other news... if anyone finds a plane ticket to Prague in the next couple of days, could I have it??
Here's why
and
Here too
Sorry guys, couldn't resist throwing those in!
Not much of this is new if you've read the other sex blogs... but it seemed too much to leave as just a comment:
Finally a group of (mostly) virgins (wouldn't want to speak for everyone though) who are willing to frankly talk about sex! May seem odd to you that I find this at all impressive, but you have to remember that I grew up in a church that seems to subscribe to the notion that frank discussions of sex will encourage kids to go out and do it. We had a class on sexual purity in 8th grade, which (though skewed) was a nice complement to school's sex ed, but it was not so much of a discussion but a lecture on what not to do. I suppose my feelings about this come back to my idea that it is not inherently wrong to talk about anything, and that we actually NEED to talk about things if we are going to live happily and safely. But more on that in a minute.
After reading all these blogs I find myself agreeing the most with David, but I would quibble with his concern for people who hold sex as "sacred". It probably comes down to a question of definition. I suppose I use the word sacred where David uses symbolic, and much of that I'm sure comes from my religious faith. As much as I complain about some of the dogma of the church, some of it really makes sense to me.
For me it's not just about being able to wear the white dress on my wedding day, and it's not about fear of STIs or getting pregnant (though I won't say that I've never worried about that). What it's really about is my ability to control what my body does, and when I'm ready to completely commit my life to someone else (which for me means being married) being able to give my body along with everything else. It's a strange notion, especially coming from someone who has days as fiercely feminist as I do, but it seems to me to be a very sacred and special thing to do... to be able to look my husband dead in the eye and say "you are the only person who has access to this part of my life." I would also like the same from him, because I agree that our sexual double-standard sucks, but I've had to learn to relax some of that because I know everyone else in the world does not agree with me and I'd hate to lose a wonderful guy just because he wasn't a virgin.
And more than that, beyond anything physical that is involved with having sex is the emotional component that I think is the most neglected in any discussion. There seems to be a balance-of-power (for lack of a better phrase) issue at stake sometimes. Some girls I've talked to say they were glad to have a more experienced partner when they first had sex, but quite honestly the very thought terrifies me! I'm self-conscious enough when I even talk to guys, but the very notion of being at all intimate with someone knowing that there's been another girl before me heightens that almost beyond bearing. It's one of my biggest problems with the sexual double-standard. I spend time wondering whether I can ever measure up to wht he had with her, and whether he wishes I were more like her, or more different, or whatever... and it probably makes me much less fun because I'm so worried all the time.
It's also been interesting being on a college campus where not having sex makes you weirder than having sex. In high school the girls who talked about having sex and birth control and worried about being pregnant got called sluts... but today I live with a girl who spent fall quarter amassing a collection of condoms from the health center because they were not only useful but came in pretty colors. (We actually gave the pink one to a guy friend of ours as a symbol of our approval for his new girlfriend.) A girl a few doors down was actually worried after breaking up with her boyfriend that she'd never have sex again. The girls I dance with are on a great variety of birth control options for as great a variety of reasons. At the same time, none of them are bad girls and I would defend them from anyone who called them so... and they respect my choice not to have sex and would defend me for my decision.
It's all the other issues surrounding the choice to have sex that I wish health classes covered. I know it's important to know how our bodies work and what the concequences of sexual activity are, but who cares about condom use? Show people how to use them properly, offer them free to anyone who wants one, and then move on! Learning that you're not ready for a baby is important in high school, but it's not fair that fear is what we're being brought up to feel when we think about sex. It's supposed to be one of the best things in human relationships, and stigmatizing it and making us afraid of it is only going to make us unhealthy. Sex is healthy, waiting to have sex is healthy, talking about sex is healthy (though I should add the disclaimer that, as with everything, it should be done in the proper place/time).
I just wish there were some way to convince society that young people are capable of the level of discussion about sex that we've been having today...
Ok kids, I'm throwing my hat into the ring... I'll probably agree with a lot that has been said, but I'm tired of pulling punches, so controversy here we come!
1. Taxes are a good thing, if they are responsible. I could go on all day about my opinions on taxes, but it boils down to the fact that we cannot trust people to voluntarily fork over the funds to make sure things run smoothly, so we have to demand from each what he can afford to pay.
2. Freedom of speech is fundamental, but it should be mentioned that conservative elements deserve it as much as liberals, and we have to be willing to step up and defend the speech of people whom we thoroughly disagree with. More on this in the next section. I will mention that freedom of speech is an entirely seperate issue from comon decency... I will let you say whatever you want, but if you are rude to me I will take offense and let you know how rude I find you. And I probably won't listen anymore. Doesn't mean you have no right to say it, but it does mean you will never convince me of your point.
3. Christianity, if practiced the way I understand it, is not something a government official can remove from his daily life. It is fair to complain about required prayers and misleading names for a nation... but it is unreasonable to ask someone to change his way of being in order to serve. There are irritating and even flat-out alarming Christians out there, but I'm a little tired of always being lumped into a category with John Ashcroft because we happen to pray to the same God. I think it is high time people recognized that and started criticizing individuals rather than accusing a religion of all the evils in the country... it's as unfair to do it to Christians as it is to blame Jews or Muslims or Pagans or Athiests. I'm not saying anyone here did so, I just feel it needed to be said.
4. I am a particular fan of NPR, because they're as close to C-Span as the radio gets (I don't have a TV). Complain if you will about the "liberal media" but they're better about balance than anyone I've seen/heard yet. Plus, I would like to lay to rest the notion of a media conspiracy... reporters don't collude or conspire, that would mean sharing information and no reporter worth his press credentials would ever help another if it mean possibly losing a story!
5. Considering that Emily can come up with the same stuff as many political comentators with no research... and that I can predict the outcome of a primary with only minimal research... I have no faith in political commentators. They serve a useful purpose by breaking down complicated issues and presenting them in layman's terms... but they're called "talking heads" for a reason.
6. If you want a definition for justified war, ask me for it. Other than that, killing people is wrong. There are punishments worse than death for those that deserve them, and those that don't deserve it shouldn't be killed. I will stand with Nick here and say that I think abortion is wrong, I also think that a fetus is absolutely a human being. Whether I think it is something I have the right to decide for someone else is something I have not decided on.
7. People are inconsistent and those in power regularly violate even their own values to maintain/extend that power. That's a fairly cynical view, I know, but unfortunately seems to be proving truer and truer.
8. I disagree with the notion that certain topics should not be discussed by certain members of society. There are times and places where it is and is not appropriate to discuss things, but saying that "men shouldn't talk about abortion" or "heterosexuals shouldn't discuss gay rights" is a step closer to censorship than I am comfortable with. People have to be allowed to discuss and debate and disagree with one another... talking about things is the only way to resolve problems and conflicts and difficult issues without violence. We have to be able to talk about it, with as many different people contributing to the discussion as possible in order to know that we are really making the difference in the world that we want to.
Happy Patriot's Day! I hope those of you who get it off are enjoying yourselves, because I am officially QUITE jealous! If you're not at the marathon, you should be!
If anyone in Boston, or anywhere for that matter, would like to send me a report on the marathon... that would be lovely. And by lovely, I mean absolutely-wonderful-making-my-day-great!
(Yes I know I can look it up online or even wait for Runner's World to come, but it's much more fun this way!)
In other news... I went running at 7 this morning with Madeline. If you are not impressed by that, I don't care... I think it's impressive, especially since I'm having trouble staying awake now. Silly body, thinking it can sleep after I exercise!
I'm the only lefty in my Honors class yet again. That is a statistical anomaly. Approximately 10% of the population isleft-handed, and with a class of more than 20, there should be at least one more of us.
My dance partner and I are both left-handed, thus our choreography styles are similar in some respects (I won't comment on my lack of ballet skills) and we almost always turn counter clockwise around our chairs. I wonder if anyone in the audience notices.
Humans are the only animals to be predominantly right-handed... something about the development of the left-hemisphere of the brain - the language center - perhaps.
In ancient China, as in most other earlier societies, children were forced to be right-handed... I would have done poorly there.
Mark Spitz was left-handed. If you don't know who Mark Spitz is... think very carefully about who this is, why I might care about Mark Spitz,... and then Google him for heaven's sake... you're on the Internet aren't you??
And finally... my favorite lefty saying: Left-handers are the only ones in their right minds! (laughs at her own joke)
**Adendum after Meredith's comment** Right-handed desks are easier for me. I can't speak for all lefties, but it is such a pain to get left-handed accomodation that it's easier to adjust. Now that I'm in a college where there are lefty desks nearly everywhere, I have discovered that I need a right-handed one to function. Especially with the folding ones, the way I lean on them makes the lefty ones flip up and spill my books everywhere. I'm not sure whether this just makes me adaptable, or a conformist to a right-hand dominant society... but I don't much care today!
I'm exhausted. Funny thing is, I went to sleep at a reasonable hour last night. Just didn't sleep well (this does not bode well for next week's tech week). Actually, I had quite the nightmare - something that hasn't happened in a long time - and I think that probably has something to do with it.
It wasn't one of my usual nightmares, being chased by axe murderers, or having Sadaam Hussein try to invade my house, and it wasn't even really that scary, but still really disruptive.
Started out ok... I was at a OHS track meet (though, because it was a dream it looked nothing like OHS) and I decided I really wanted to run. I haven't run in weeks so even in my dream I knew this was not the best idea I'd ever had. But I lined up for the 3200m anyway (my favorite race in high school) and decided to see what happened. Gun went off, and I started running. Amazingly enough, I was doing really well. My legs hurt like my blood had been replaced with acid, but I was actually winning the race so I just kept going...
Then things took a turn for the weird. Instead of running on the track, we were running inside. In some room that I don't think I've ever seen anywhere in real life. This did not strike me as unusual, because it was a dream (anyone who has taken psych 101 knows what I mean) but it is still really weird. What was worse is that on one side of the "track", just as I rounded the big filing cabinets, there were all these really heavy garbage cans and boxes filled with scraps of neon paper. I had to push them all out of my way to keep running. And it got worse from there... at once point the carpet suddenly lost all traction and I could hardly move much less run (as I was not wearing the proper shoes for running either). And then I lost one of my shoes, had to take off my sock because it wouldn't grip the slippery carpet, and had to finish the stupid race that way.
For whatever reason I was REALLY worried about my time, and I was sobbing my eyes out behind the stadium (somehow things shifted back to the track) worrying about what it would be when.... my alarm clock woke me up.
Part of me is really disappointed that I couldn't find out my time, I wonder if it would have made the dream end well, and part of me is just upset that the stupid dream was so stressful that I don't feel like I've slept at all! I don't care about any underlying meanings, I just wish this wouldn't happen at such inconvenient times.
*Sigh* hope that brief trip into my twisted psyche hasn't scarred you too badly.
Met a new person today. It's not something I do particularly often around here, but occasionally it does happen.
I was sitting on my bed finishing my reading for Chinese lit and both because it was a little musty in our room and because it was beautiful and warm outside we had the door open. Guy walks buy, on his cell phone. Time passes... same guy walks by again (going the other direction) and waves this time. Guy does a double-take when he sees the picture on our window of Molly's friend. Pokes his head inside, "that's quite the picture you have on your window."
*Note: this is a picture of Molly's friend, on his bed (or someone's bed) in a somewhat risque pose (think Playboy) wearing only a few discretely placed stuffed animals. Not my idea of wonderful room decor, but it's her side of the window.
"Well," I say, "it's my roommate's. It's her friend and she thinks it's funny." He nods and suggests that I take it down and hide it/throw it away and tell her that someone just randomly ran in and stole it. Apparenly that worked for him with his roommate.. (Unfortunately that is exactly the kind of story that Molly normally makes up, so she'd never believe it.)
At this point I decide to introduce myself. Turns out his name is Brian (every asian guy I meet on campus is named Brian!) and he lives in the building next to the beautiful building on campus, which means he also has a key to my building and was just stopping by to print something for his PoliSci class. He sees my Kerry for President sticker on my bulletin board and asks about it... this is the starting point for our 20 minute discussion about world politics, our particular choices for careers to change the world (he wants to be a mercenary... ok, private contractor, but you know what I mean) and the PoliSci professor we have in common.
Strangest bit of this all is that it was the kind of discussion I don't have very often. We talked about political stuff that I don't even discuss with Cortni or Emily (mostly because Cortni doesn't enjoy it and Emily gets too upset... sorry, but you know it's true.) I don't have a lot of "discussion/debate friends" around here and it was great to meet someone I could argue with rationally without it being awkward.
On a related, but different note: I would also like to point out for posterity that I had a reasonable, rational, and even enjoyable conversation with someone who has some views I REALLY disagree with... I think this is a step for me... so I hope no one minds while I just enjoy the moment!
I won't explain the whole list of rules for Handball in this year's Olympics (which you should all go read, it's very interesting!) lest you all get bored and start throwing things at me...
But I do wish that we had played handball in school. My dad tells stories about how he used to play in middle(?) school and how fun it was. If you weren't careful you could end up with hexagonal handball patterns on your face... but it still sounds like a crazy intense fun game that any kid would love to play!
Just looking at the pictures on the Olympics website makes me wish I had talent enough to play. I SUCK at any sport/activitiy involving any sort of equipment not worn on one's feet.... but I wish I could run around and leap over my opponents to fling the ball into the goal... it looks cool, it sounds like fun, and more and more I regret the trend I see in the world for sports to be just another thing kids are forced to do that they give up at puberty in favor of their Playstations.
I won't go off on my crusade today about how I think kids in school are being denied a full opportunity to develop their bodies... and I understand the argument that some kids just aren't good at sports and shouldn't be forced into them... but I just can't quite understand how running around and jumping and throwing things (especially Nerf balls... most 10 year olds can't throw them hard enough to do damage) and yelling is not a vital part of education! I'm not saying we need to train our kids to be stellar athletes if they don't want to... I'm talking about dodgeball, and kickball, and capture the flag, and partner tag! *deep breath* Save that rant for another day!
And an explanation about my Olympics craze... because I think some of you just don't appreciate where I'm coming from and I feel the need to explain myself. I love the Olympics because it is one of the rare opportunities left in the world for truly great athletes to compete against one another merely for the sake of competing. It isn't about the money (endorsements aside), it's about the glory... it's about being the best, out of everyone in the world. An Olympic gold means something because other countries had a chance to compete.
Plus, it is real amateur competition, very few Olympic sports have the kind of showboating and posturing seen in most American professional sports (the bad behavior of our hockey team and sprint relay team aside). I love the genuine nature of the competition, there is something real about it that you don't see anywhere else these days. And it isn't about nationality or ethnicity or religion or politics, it's about who is the best, plain and simple. The Olympics represents an ideal for the world that, while often unrealized in practice, is something I think we should be striving for all the time.
I'll let you get back to not caring now... but I hope you take some time to appreciate the awesomeness of Olympic athletes and maybe take some of the spirit of the games with you as you go. Or at least look at the awesome handball pictures, those guys are intense!
This story contains some unfair notions about blogs and the people who view them... but they all represent something in my confused little head so if you don't like it my response will inevitibly be, "phhhhhtbbt!"
I have been a big Dave Barry fan since middle school, when Sarah and my Mom and Mr. Johnston simultaneously started bringing his column to me and saying, "read this, I think you'll like it". Since then, I don't think I've missed more than a few columns period. Of course, being the cheap college student that I am, I no longer get a newspaper... so I had to go searching online for my weekly Dave fix. This is where my weird story begins... mostly.
While I was roaming the internet aimlessly (as I am wont to do sometimes) I discovered that not only does Dave Barry have his columns posted on the Miami Herald website, he has his own website (it seems everyone does these days) complete with the "Dave Barry Blog". Being a late-comer to the blog scene, I'd heard of blogs... but never really been much of a follower of the trend. But I was bored, so I clicked.
Dave's blog is merely his posting of random news stories sent in my "alert readers" from around the world (mostly Claire Martin and Mike Zlotnick(?) though). I enjoy clicking the links and reading about "snake awareness month" or "celebrity rubber ducks". Sometimes I send these links on to unsuspecting people of my acquaintence... which would be a lot more evil if they didn't do it right back.
But what was really strange was looking at the comments made by the OTHER people reading the blog. The comments themselves were much like our comments here, but sometimes they commented on one another's comments, on one another in general, and even had a small war going on about whether or not Dave's research assistant "judi" should be allowed to post her blog entries of links to pictures of gorgeous men! These people had conversations in their comments, and even now have a chat room so they don't just comment over and over and over and over... all night long.
These guys don't actually know each other... but they talk like they're old friends. They live in different time zones (heck, different countries!) but still make jokes about who's a slut and who's a dirty old man and who is "too innocent to be hearing this" and talk about their hangovers and ex-boyfriends and ex-wives... they link one another to their own blogs, websites, and the like... and who knows what goes on in that chatroom! It's all perfectly reasonable if you accept the notion that one can connect with people one doesn't even know based on online conversations, I suppose.
What's strangest about all this is that I can't help wonder how I got sucked into it. I have yet to comment, not wishing to incur the possible wrath of some of these people, but I still read the comments regularly. I don't understand the phenomenon of people just talking across cyberspace to others they don't know, I just don't get it.
Perhaps I'm secretly a conservative-the-world-is-flat-everyone-but-me-is-evil hermit in the woods... but I think maybe I'm simply as compter illiterate as I keep trying to tell people. I mostly know how to use a computer, most of the time, but I have yet to catch up with the cultural revolution that has come with the internet. I mean, I didn't even include my experience in the world of internet fan-dom... oh yes! That's another story for another time... but suffice it to say that I was very much out of my element there as well.
And so, from backwards-hole-in-the-woods-under-a-rock-ville... this is Old Lady Melissa... wishing you all a wonderful day, even if she fails to understand most of it!
News bulletin!
The Olympic flame has finally reached Athens... yes ladies and gents, despite any rumors you may have been hearing... there WILL be an Olympics this year, and it WILL be in Athens! The torch, after being lit on the 25th in Olympia, roved the Greek countryside and finally made it to the stadium yesterday. Now it's off on a 78-day journey across the world, reaching each of the 5 continents represented by the Olympic rings. (I have yet to figure out what the continents are... but I'll let you know when I do.)
Interesting note: the torch will travel to Africa and Latin America on this international relay... places it has never been before... as well as Beijing - site of the 2008 Olympics (and there will be news about that too, but not today.) I just thought it was interesting that the torch has never been to Africa. I suppose it makes sense, but I never thought of it before. One would think that with all those Kenyan runners turning the rest of the world green with envy... but I guess political turmiol is a legitimate reason to not send the Olympics to places, as disappointing as it may be. I am officially accepting suggestions of stable African nations to suggest to the IOC for consideration in a decade or so! (Latin America falls under the same category, but I only have enough brain power for one continent.)
In other exciting news... 19 year old Australian Libby Lenton set a world record in the 100m freestyle during the Australian Olympic trials. The new world record goes from 53.77s (Norway's Inge de Bruijn in 2000... in the same pool)to 53.66 for Ms. Lenton. That Australian pool must be greased or something, what with all the records set there. And just think... if I had had any athletic talent I too could be a world record holder and potential Olympian!
Stay tuned for more Olympics news... AND a report on the sport of the month: Handball!
**Adendum** The five Olympic Continents: Africa, Asia, America, Europe, Oceania.